I’m delighted to offer you the opportunity to join me and six other leaders at my Antietam & Gettysburg exclusive event, December 7-10. The battlefields will build your imagination for the action steps to make 2022 your best year ever.
Among the topics we typically discuss:
*Action steps to put the right leaders on the scene and empower them to make decisions. *How to help your subordinates achieve “leader-on-horseback” inspiration so that people have clear examples to follow. *How to create innovation and gain a competitive advantage. Ways to set up your new subordinates for success and keep them winning. *Action steps that create clarity, buy-in, and accountability. Ways to let in fresh ideas and avoid smelling your own gunpowder.
You’ll come away from the event with action steps that will power your success in 2022 and lifelong relationships with other great leaders that will boost the quality of your life.
Find out more about the exclusive event here or paste this link into your browser: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1iNdcCraLLzL1ioHT7hZAS4XvnTpcDJ8j/view?usp=sharing
Here’s what participants say about the event: Gain buy-in like Chamberlain; encourage people to take the initiative like Buford. This inspiring and interesting experience is giving me new tools and stories to develop leaders. Dick Gephardt, former Majority Leader, U.S. House of Representatives; CEO, Gephardt Group
00Christopher KolendaChristopher Kolenda2021-10-11 18:45:002022-02-07 05:59:44Upcoming Leaders Opportunity at Antietam & Gettysburg this December – LIMITED AVAILIBILITY
They suffer a disorder similar to siloed ones: poor accountability.
Matrixed Organizations Don’t Work
Matrixed organizations don’t work. They suffer a disorder similar to siloed ones: poor accountability. The Afghanistan failure is exhibit A; it’s the same principle in business.
Members of Congress and America’s punditry recently awoke to the calamity in Afghanistan. The war ranks at the top of the biggest foreign policy disasters in U.S. history. In his Senate testimony on September 28th, Joint Chiefs Chairman General Mark Milley admitted that we lost to a rag-tag militant group known as the Taliban. Cue the hue-and-cry. And yet, no one has been held accountable for the fiasco.
The reason is simple: there’s been no one on the ground in charge of the war.
Wait. What?
That’s right. There’s no one in charge on the ground, so there’s no one to hold accountable for success or failure. There’s no single American the President can look to and say, “you are responsible for achieving success in Afghanistan.”
The military has a portion of the responsibility: fighting the enemy and training the (defunct) Afghan Army. The diplomats are in charge of building the (defunct) Afghan government capacity and coordinating with allies and neighboring countries. The U.S. Agency for International Aid and Development (USAID) is responsible for helping the (destroyed) Afghan economy and infrastructure. In intelligence agencies coordinate clandestine operations and provide intelligence assessments, while training the (dismantled) Afghan intelligence agency.
There’s no one below the President of the United States who has the authority and responsibility for making it all work together half a world away. Everyone else works comfortably in their silos.
While the generals, diplomats, aid workers, and spooks each talked about their progress, the situation kept deteriorating. The main causes for failure include the vast corruption within the Afghan government and military, and the Taliban sanctuaries in Pakistan. These problems occurred in the fault lines between the silos. Because no one was in charge of U.S. efforts on the ground, no one had the authority to address them or to tell the President that we needed a new strategy.
https://chriskolenda.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/bW.jpg436691Christopher KolendaChristopher Kolenda2021-10-06 17:00:502022-02-07 05:46:39Matrixed Organizations Don’t Work
Forbes released an article on September 19, 2021, stating that empathy is the most important leadership skill. The greater the empathy, the greater the innovation, engagement, retention, inclusivity, and the ability to navigate the demands of work and life. Wow! That’s a jam-packed list of positive outcomes. Better yet, empathy reaps more empathy. You are in a leadership position, which comes with a huge responsibility in helping your employees to be their best selves. If you can’t empathize with them, how can you help them?
Empathy can come in many forms. Be present, acknowledge their feelings and thoughts without one-upping them, ask questions, give eye contact, don’t multi-task, be compassionate, and be both emotionally and cognitively open.
As a leader, I saw the outcome of my empathy and lack thereof. I worked hard to create a safe place for my employees to feel heard and understood. I asked that the elephant be put on the table, that the conversation was solution-focused, and I listened to understand. The staff was appreciative that they could work in a building where they felt valued and cared for.
I didn’t always get it right, though. Once the pandemic hit, I wanted to continue the exact same pre-pandemic trajectory. I was quick to stop complaints in mid-sentence―especially when those complaints were done in large teams. I wanted the team meetings to be focused, positive, and efficient so that the already overwhelmed staff could get back to their demanding jobs. My misstep was that the staff wanted to feel heard, validated, and built up. I created more of an us vs. them mentality by cutting them off. Thank goodness, I had a strong set of team leaders who shed some light on the situation and I was able to pivot into a more understanding role.
Here’s the deal, leading with empathy is crucial. It’s not a weakness, it’s not catering to the millennials or the snowflakes, it is part of our evolving workplace. We keep talking about how the millennials have changed the ways of business. Well, guess what? Gen Z is now entering the workforce. What impact do you think they will have on the way we run our businesses and the way we lead?
Follow the R.E.T.E.N.T.I.O.N. steps to better empathize and hold on to your valuable employees:
· RESPECT – Give people your full attention when they speak. Keep in mind that constructive criticism and feedback can be done in a respectful way. · EMPATHIZE – Lend an ear, help problem-solve―hopefully giving your employees the agency to create solutions on their own thereafter, and listen to understand. · TRUST – Use compassion, integrity, and consistency. It will boost employee buy-in. · ENGAGE – Boost engagement by purposefully hiring employees to work within their passions and strengths so that they’ll enjoy what they do. · NORMS (rules of engagement) – Set reasonable expectations, stick to them, and ask that everyone assist in holding each other accountable. · TIME – Have patience, don’t overwork your employees, offer professional development opportunities. The more your employees grow, the more your business will grow. · INNOVATE – Allow your team to be creative. This will not only boost workplace satisfaction, but it will move your organization forward and it will give your employees a sense of belonging. · OPENLY PRAISE – Acknowledge, validate, and give positive feedback for work well done. · NEEDS – Offer assistance and understanding when needed. Be sure to treat mental health the same way you treat physical health. Burn-out can have much greater implications for your business’s productivity than a broken leg. Most importantly, make sure your cup is full. It’s a great way to lead by example and only then can you offer your best self to help others.
“Setting up a franchise is stupid,” Anna (not her real name) told me, “and forget about coaching. Coaches are a dime-a-dozen. You should enroll in our veterans’ program and figure out what you are able to do.”
Did you ever notice that unsolicited feedback is always about the sender and never about you?
Most feedback is about the sender. Look at your evaluations, and you’ll find that what your boss highlighted reflects their own priorities rather than an objective appraisal of you.
Unsolicited feedback is even more problematic because there is no accountability, and it’s often about control. The sender wants you to conform, be like them, and not rock the boat or challenge their beliefs.
Anna wanted to badger me into enrolling in a program that I did not need and discourage me from helping veterans build a meaningful, joyful, and profitable consulting business.
When someone gives you unsolicited advice, think SMILE: the five fingers of sanity and success.
Your thumb, closest to your heart, represents the letter S: self-care. Exercise, diet, sleep, study, and well-being are vital to sustainable success.
Your pointer represents M: mentors, coaches, and advisors. They point out the shortest path to success and help you avoid getting high from your own fumes. I have two coaches, and their support has paid for itself many times over.
Your middle finger stands for I: Ignore the Annas.
Your ring finger: L is for loved ones. Dedicate time to those who matter most. No one’s ever had a deathbed with that they’d spent less time with their loved ones and more time at the office.
Your pinky signifies E: your employees, customers, partners, and allies. They are the people you serve.
SMILE, and you’ll keep things in perspective. Here’s thevideothat you can viewand share.
https://chriskolenda.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/09/shaurya-sagar-A4wa3SpyOsg-unsplash-scaled.jpg19202560Christopher KolendaChristopher Kolenda2021-09-27 14:50:312022-02-04 12:35:27Getting Unsolicited Advice? Think SMILE: The Five Fingers of Sanity and Success
Unsolicited feedback can rattle around in the think tank and disrupt sleep, family time, and even invade the sacred workout brain space.
Feedback – The Great, the Mediocre, and the Ugly
If you’re like me, you find feedback around every corner, especially when embarking on a new role. Sometimes that feedback changes one’s life for the better and other times it has the power to ruin your day. Unsolicited feedback can rattle around in the think tank and disrupt sleep, family time, and even invade the sacred workout brain space. It has the ability to disrupt workplace productivity, innovation, creativity, and can ultimately upset the culture. Have you ever worked at a place where the unsolicited feedback was more about your fellow employees’ insecurities than your own performance? It makes me shake my head just thinking about it.
Here’s what I’ve learned from keeping an open-door policy and graciously accepting all the feedback that was given to me. Some of it is pure rubbish. Ever heard of mansplaining? It’s patronizing and condescending. That’s what unsolicited feedback can be—it’s a power play and is more about the giver than the receiver. When I returned from Iraq in 2004 I was telling a 22-year-old man about some of my war stories and he had the gall to tell me I was wrong and that his veteran buddies had a much different take on the war. I was appalled that he said I was wrong about my own experience. My young adult self didn’t know how to react to his “feedback.”
I have also been in incredibly awkward situations when a past supervisor gave me feedback on how to respond to an employee issue. This feedback was in direct conflict with my core value of open communication and respect. It felt like a violation of my ideals and put me in a sticky situation of disobeying orders or disobeying myself. Don’t get me wrong, feedback can be a gift. It can help us grow, it can enhance our strengths, and it can take us from good to great. I get feedback about these articles before I post them and I’m incredibly grateful for that feedback. The key to good feedback is accountability. Feedback from credible sources and trusted advisors helps us to avoid getting high on our own fumes. Unsolicited feedback is fire-and-forget, unaccountable, and is almost always about the sender.
Keep this in mind:
*Before internalizing feedback, make sure the feedback is coming from a reputable source and that the source has your best interest in mind. Listen to solicited feedback.
*The feedback should be efficacious and not detract from your positive trajectory.
*Be purposeful about surrounding yourself with people who will build you up to the best version of yourself and help you from breathing your own exhaust.
*Always remember, no matter how smart, powerful, interesting, far-up-the-ladder, or renowned the person giving the feedback is, it’s an opinion. You have the CHOICE to take it or let it go.
*It’s ok to let the unsolicited feedback take a one-way trip in one ear and out the other—especially if it’s hurtful or negative. Good luck and continue your positive self-talk. After all, you know yourself best.
Additional Offerings:
Are you looking for a Keynote Speaker at your next event? I use my past experiences and knowledge to show you how to be the best version of yourself, surround yourself with the right people, and build highly productive teams.
Book: Sirens: How to Pee Standing Up – An alarming memoir of combat and coming back him. This book depicts the time of war and its aftermath. It seamlessly bridges the civilian and military divide and offers clarity to moral injury and post-traumatic stress.
00Laura ColbertLaura Colbert2021-09-23 16:17:192022-02-04 10:22:40Feedback : The Great, the Mediocre, and the Ugly
The legendary Lt. Gen Hal Moore (We Were Soldiers Once … and Young) called the first edition “the absolute best book on military leadership.” The second edition is even better.
I’ve added three new chapters and a Foreword by former Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson. I’ve also updated the existing chapters, included top takeaways and action steps, and made other enhancements.
Here’s what people are saying:
“This powerful new edition provides practical tools for military leaders who want to prepare themselves and their troops for combat, build trust and respect in their teams, and adapt to a very different and complex post-9/11 world. As a combat-tested leader, military historian, and now CEO coach, Kolenda offers an unmatched set of insights on how to be a more effective leader. Truly invaluable.”
MICHÈLE A. FLOURNOY, West Exec CEO, former Under Secretary of Defense for Policy
“In battle and business, most battles are not won through brute force but leadership brilliance. Chris Kolenda combines military discipline and strategy with leadership ‘smarts’ in a pragmatic, fascinating book that should be a must-read for any present or aspiring leader.”
Alan Weiss, Ph.D., author of Fearless Leadership and over sixty other books in fifteen languages
An invaluable, exceptional source of illuminating insights on military leadership. The first edition was widely used and highly regarded by combat leaders in Iraq and Afghanistan; the second edition will be an equally valuable resource for leaders seeking to meet the challenges of the post-9/11 world.
General David Petraeus, former Commander of US Central Command and Coalition Forces in Afghanistan, and former Director of the CIA
As an OIF female combat veteran, I wish the last three chapters existed and were mandatory reading before my 2003 deployment . . . these leadership lessons not only apply to the military but any leadership position.
Laura Colbert, leadership adviser, author of Sirens: How to Pee Standing Up
Comprehensive, readable, and insightful—a must-read for military leaders navigating the challenges of the post-9/11 era!
00sla2020sla20202021-09-20 11:23:292022-02-07 05:33:14Today is the day! I’m so excited that the 2nd edition of Leadership: The Warrior’s Art gets released today.
Culture is a vital facet in a successful business and a successful community
IS YOUR CULTURE ALL IT’S CRACKED UP TO BE?
Back in 2003, I was stationed in Baghdad, Iraq as a military police officer. We were three months into the war and my squad was working in an Iraqi Police station on the northeast side of Baghdad. Our police station was decrepit with broken panes of glass in the windowsills, cigarette butts piled in the corner on the blackened floor, and no flushing toilets. On this particular day, I was sitting in the front of the station taking complaints from Iraqi citizens. During one of the quieter moments the female interpreter, Nada, said, “The reason why the Iraqis are not behaving is that they don’t know how to respond to freedom. Under Saddam’s dictatorship, they would lose their life or limb for infractions. Now they can loot, drive down the wrong side of the street, slight their neighbor, and barely anything happens.” I had an epic epiphany at that moment. We, as Americans, couldn’t possibly comprehend the Iraqi’s emotions, thoughts, and the fallout that occurred after liberating Iraq. The saying that “culture eats strategy for breakfast” not only existed in Iraq but the native culture killed our foreign policy—both in Iraq and Afghanistan. One could say that the same thing happened in Vietnam. Our inability to empathize and develop policies that directly correlate with the centuries-old culture left us unable to make the impact we hoped for. Our democratic values and ethos aren’t a match for the complexities of the middle east.
As a new leader, do you fully understand the culture in your workplace? What about a seasoned leader, is your workplace culture the same as you envision it to be?
This week, new research revealed that Instagram is toxic for teen girls and their mental health. Additionally, Facebook tried to make its platform a healthier place but it got angrier instead. Both are negatively impacting the social media culture. What are they going to do about it? There could be societal and workplace nuances pulling your operating culture away from your envisioned culture. When was the last time you checked your organization’s cultural pulse?
Misunderstanding culture can ruin progress. Inability to empathize with your employees and understand their intricacies can diminish trust. Culture is a fragile entity within a working environment. A change in procedures, employees, leadership, or the environment around us can cause the culture to fluctuate. As a principal, I saw how the pandemic drastically affected our school’s culture. It was disheartening and tragic to witness our community complain about one another. Tensions caused discontent. Misinformation and assumptions divided the workforce. To combat the change, I utilized several tactics to retain our culture, to provide support, and to create lasting memories even though we weren’t face-to-face. The results created a community of understanding and buy-in, which enabled the staff to work together and focus on their priority―student learning.
Is your culture really as good as you think it is? Are you asking the right questions and looking at the correct indicators to make sure your envisioned culture and your operating culture are consistent? What suggests they are out of whack. Action steps: Keep an eye on your culture. Check in often with all of your employee levels and be fully present. Look past the “please-the-boss” façade and see what your employees see. Don’t ever settle when hiring. You’ll gain a reputation for hiring the best and your employees will appreciate the fact that they work with the best and they are the best. Make sure you’re not blind to a slowly declining culture. Sometimes the change is so subtle we don’t notice it happening. An outside perspective (consultant) can be a vital asset for this action step. Be a part of the positive change. Lead by example―treat everyone with respect and dignity. Do not gossip and vent at work. Purposefully plan events to bring your employees together to create a sense of belonging and use that opportunity to grow as a team. A greater sense of belonging equates to greater productivity. Are you asking yourself, “How do I do this?” I can help!laura.colbert@strategicleadersacademy.com
00Laura ColbertLaura Colbert2021-09-18 11:19:212022-02-04 12:37:05IS YOUR CULTURE ALL IT’S CRACKED UP TO BE?
Americans commemorate September 11th in their own ways. I spent the day at Fort McCoy, Wisconsin, which houses roughly 13,000 Afghan refugees. A former interpreter from one of my units, MJ, is there with his family.
MJ served in one of the most remote outposts of Afghanistan. In such areas, interpreter turnover can be very high. Some take leave and don’t return; others get reassigned to more peaceful areas and larger bases closer to their families.
MJ stayed with his company for the full 15 months. I asked MJ why he stuck it out. “I respected Captain Page and the company. They took good care of me, and we were making a difference.” What had been one of the most violent areas in Afghanistan in 2007 was one of the more peaceful a year later.
More Americans than ever are leaving their jobs for different employers or careers. Employee turnover, which can range from 50% to 200% of the employee’s annual salary, is one of the highest costs any company faces. For solopreneurs, turnover in your partners and subcontractors results in lost momentum, increased rework, higher expenses, and a greater risk of things falling through the cracks.
MJ provides insight on how to retain your top talent. Gain buy-in by letting people know what you need them to do and why, and having them figure out how. Set clear expectations and hold people accountable. Treat them well and make sure they’ve got the resources and support they need to be successful. Captain John Page did that for his company, which kept MJ on the team. MJ’s support and understanding helped save American lives and change Afghan lives for the better.
MJ and his family of 8 left Afghanistan with only the clothes on their backs. The conditions in refugee camps, even ones like Fort McCoy, are difficult. MJ never complained. He’s grateful to have a chance to build a new life for his family and wants to open an Afghan restaurant.
https://chriskolenda.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/09/Chris-Kolenda-Afghan-interpreter-scaled.jpg19202560Christopher KolendaChristopher Kolenda2021-09-14 14:14:552021-09-17 16:52:20How I Chose to Commemorate 9/11
Imagine that you must travel for a work assignment. The Uber driver arrives at your house, and you get in the car with your luggage. You arrive at the airport, drop your bags with a skycap, greet the flight attendant, and say hello to the pilot. You settle in for a flight, having granted trust to people you likely have never met—the driver, skycap, pilot. Do you know who did the maintenance checks on the plane? My friend and colleague John O’Grady, COL, US Army (Ret), creates an insightful paradox, “We trust these people with our lives and often those of our families, without a second thought. Yet, in our most important and intimate relationships, we withhold trust. With our work colleagues, those whom we inherently rely on for success, we say, ‘You must earn my trust.'”
Why?
Perhaps the socialization of trust has been wrong. What if we granted the same level of trust to the people closest to us as we do to the drivers and pilots in our lives? Imagine having high trust relationships that start with “you have my trust, and it can only be eroded or lost” rather than a “trust must be earned” mentality. The buy-in and responsibility felt by the newly trusted employee go through the roof! So, too, does their commitment to maintaining that trust. Here are a few steps towards cultivating a culture of trust:
· Set clear expectations · Instead of only talking about trust at the beginning of a relationship, and then again only if it is broken or lost, make trust part of your team’s everyday conversations · Use the space between those conversations to talk about how employees are demonstrating behavior that aligns with your expectations · When you think there may be a trust issue arising, approach it from a position of authentic curiosity instead of being accusatory; find the underlying reasons for the issue and collaboratively address them · Maintain trust behaviors and a trusted environment before it becomes broken; be proactive
Cultivating a culture of trust is like any leader’s action: it is a choice. To create work environments where trust flourishes, we need to understand how trust works; the ways it is given, built, maintained; and how it becomes lost or broken. We can then teach ourselves how to act and react in ways that help cultivate trust, even in the most challenging situations.
00Jeff MarquezJeff Marquez2021-09-12 10:24:232022-02-04 12:38:14Leading the Middle – Give Trust, Earn Trust
Leading the Middle – Powerful Lessons from the Bloody Knuckles Garage
Earlier this year, my friend and former colleague Aaron told me he was sick. He never said the word cancer, but his treatment and prognosis revealed the battle he was fighting. He said Miracle Max would have to pull off a big one. COVID complicated visits, so his family and friends had to support him from a distance. He was finally released from the hospital and is now at home but with regular trips for treatments and check-ups. As you might imagine, he received offers of help and support. I want to share what I learned from his response to his prognosis, acceptance of help, and the gifts he shares.
Aaron and I got to know each other through the shared experience of building a new Team in a new organization, creating processes, and contending with toxic leadership. He is retired Air Force; I am retired Army. He likes hard rock; I prefer classic R & B and Latin music. He studied electrical engineering; I studied behavioral sciences. Our oppositeness became our strength. We leveraged each other’s ideas. We got to know what makes each other tick, and we built the best Team in the organization.
We often talked about him selling his big house, but there were a few projects that he wanted to complete before putting it up for sale. His prognosis changed his priorities. He sent an email to family and friends with things he wanted to be done to the house. Each task was in prioritized order with dimensions, materials on hand, and colors. Section two of the email was tool availability, section three was material acquisition, four was visitor plans, and finally, accommodations. It was typical Aaron, organized and detailed enough to know what was needed to get the job done.
I responded to the email telling him when I planned to come over to work on the house. He kindly declined. You see, Aaron is a car guy owning a 1972 AMC Javelin, 1973 Pontiac Firebird, and a 2007 Pontiac Solstice, all with car covers, along with a late-model ninja motorcycle and a newer truck. I claim to be a shade tree mechanic, so we often shared our car-oriented escapades. When I offered to work on the house, his priority, he said “Nah, I need your help with the cars.”
For the past month, I have spent every Monday working on the cars in what I now call the Bloody Knuckles Garage (BKG). On my drive home after the first Monday, I thought, here is a man fighting cancer yet showing humanness (trust, respect, and empathy) and sharing his grace by wanting me to do something he knows I enjoy. I cherish walking into the dark garage, opening the garage door so that the sunlight comes in, putting on my music, removing the car cover, and starting the job of the day. The tasks are clear with what to do, but not how to do it. The timeline is mine, and I have discovered a new level of patience. I have found myself in uncomfortable positions like being wedged between the floorboard and the dash. I am doing repairs I have never done before. When he is home, and I go into the house, I give him an update and tell him what is next. He nods and tells me, “go for it, I trust you.” I treasure our conversations and experiences.
Whether you are a Mid-Leader, a CEO or senior executive, or an early career professional, here are lessons from my friend Aaron and my time, so far, at the BKG:
· Trust is bonding
· Perspective and patience are revealing
· The diversity of people, thought, and experiences of your Team is a superpower
· Give them the tools, tell them what to do but not how to do it & watch them shine
· Learning & development can happen anywhere when you allow them to happen
· Multiply your experiences and create the same for your Team
· Being uncomfortable is when growth happens
· Do it afraid
· People matter more than anything
Please extend good wishes, positive vibes, and prayers for my friend Aaron. The more, the better. He is a stand-up guy. Trust me, we are better because he is among us.
00Jeff MarquezJeff Marquez2021-09-12 10:20:042022-02-07 06:23:17Whether you are a Mid-Leader, a CEO or senior executive, or an early career professional, here are powerful lessons from my friend Aaron and my time, so far, at the BKG
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